


Grief

by LittleBitOffanfic



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Reader Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-14
Updated: 2019-09-14
Packaged: 2020-10-18 15:30:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20641475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleBitOffanfic/pseuds/LittleBitOffanfic
Summary: Fandom: TMNTRequest: Hi! I would like to first say that your writing is amazing! You're SUPER talented! And, if you're still accepting requests, can you do one for TMNT? How would the boys react to an s/o being tortured and killed by the Shredder? Can you make it super angst please? Thanks!





	Grief

Not a thing could be heard as April entered the lair, 4 sets of eyes trained on her, begging for good news. But when she opened her mouth, nothing came out but a whimper. She blinked, tears streaming down her cheek as she tried to tell them what had happened. To tell them that her best friend, that their best friend, his soul mate, was dead.   
Leo:   
Denial. Leo would immediately go into denial. You were alive, you had to be. You were strong and resilient. There must be a mistake. But when the realization dawned on him that you truly weren’t coming back, it would break him. You were his anchor. You kept him grounded and helped him when he felt weakest.   
He completely stopped meditating, or anything that allowed him time to think to himself. It showed in his abilities as he became less mindful and more reactive. One evening, Splinter sat down with him.   
“You do not meditate as you once did.” He would state, knowing there was no point as posing it as a question. And Leo knew better than to lie to Splinter. In fact, he hoped he would help.   
“I cant clear my mind any more. I just keep thinking about her. I can almost here her sometimes.” Leo would smile despite the tears in his eyes. He though of the about of times you had bounded through the door while he was meditating, then try to sneak up on him.   
“Then… don’t.” Splinter said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Leo looked at him ,confused.   
“I am sorry you had to lose her. That we all did. But she was a bright spirit. Its hard to extinguish that from our lifes. So we wont. Use the time to remember her. To think about her. If you try to block the thoughts out, you’ll resent them. And she is far too good to be resented or forgotten.”   
Splinters words stuck with Leo, and later he sat for the first time in a long time, and meditated. He thought of you, smiling up at him. Time flew by and when he finally opened his eyes again, he felt relaxed. Unlike before, when he felt grief and emptiness, now he felt love. Some of the grief never went away, and he would be lying if he said he didn’t miss you with all his being. But the mediation was almost like a way to be close with you for now. Until he met you in the next life. 

Raph:   
Blame. He would get angry as well.   
“Don’t lie about that!” He would growl at April, turning and storming out the room. But half way down the hall, it would hit him. Or, at least, he would allow it to hit him. The grief that swept through his body was enough to bring him to his knees. He felt like someone had grabbed him by the throat as he struggled to breath. You were his everything, his sunshine. And yet, you had spent your last few moments in pain and darkness. You shouldn’t have been there. It should have been him.   
He would let his rage affect him every moment after.  
“Let go, Raph!” Leo would grunt as the two parted from the training. Raph had lost again, every time since you had passed. “Your rage will not bring her back.”   
Raph would charge at Leo, pinning him down.   
“Don’t.” He growled, his breaths short and sharp.   
“You think she would have wanted to see you like this? Angry all the time?” Leo challenged him, not caring how his anger any more as he tried to pull him brother out of the slump. And it worked.   
Raph knew Leo was right. You hated seeing Raph angry. In fact, Raph could almost see you walking up to him, taking his hands in your own and kissing his knuckles, a silent request to calm down that he always listened too. From that moment on, he used that. Any time he thought you might be there, kissing his knuckles, he would try to calm himself. For you. 

Donnie:   
Distraction.   
No one hear much from Donnie for weeks after. They tried to console him, to help him, but he was constantly trying to do other things. Trying to fix stuff, to move things, to create things. In some kind of warped obsession. At first, his brother were angry that he didn’t seem to have let you death faze him, but then they realised it was something much worse. He worked right through the night into morning, only stopping when he passed out from exhaustion.   
“Donnie, you have to sleep.” Leo tries to move his brother from the lab, anything to get him away. But Donnie shakes his head, a sharp intake of breath followed.   
“I cant.” Donnie tries to supress his tears, but nothing could prevent them. “Every time I close my eyes, I see her in pain. Every time I drift off, I can hear her screams. I-i-I cant-“ Donnie breaks down, his whole body shaking. Leo grabs his brother, wrapping his arms around him in an effort to comfort him. But nothing could. 

Mikey:   
He would actually be the most grounded, as strange as it was. He would want everything to be perfect for your send off, even if him and his brothers are watching for a far. That doesn’t mean he wont grief. In fact, it will become like an obsession to him. He just wants it to be perfect for you. Every night, he’ll visit your grave, bringing things he thinks he should leave there. One night, Raph comes along as Mikey is planting some flowers.   
“Do you think she would have liked it?” He asked Raph, his bottom lip shaking as they looked down at the flowers now growing.   
“Yeah, I think she’da loved ‘em.” Raph smiles, fighting his own grief so he could be strong for Mikey.   
“I know they aren’t perfect. But I tried my best. I know its not enough, but maybe-“ Mikey trailed off, his voice breaking. Raph, unsure of how to comfort Mikey, gives him time. A few minutes later, Mikey would speak again.   
“It is her favourite colour. Was…” Mikey trails off again, but this time with more fear in his eyes.   
“Is, Mikey. Shes still around.” He pats Mikeys shoulder. “And if she didn’t like them, you’d know by now. Trust me.” Raph smiles as Mikey lets out a shaking laugh. He wants to remember you as you were. How you would laugh at his silly jokes or run around with him as he pranks his brothers. He wants to remember you smiling, brightly and wholeheartedly at him.


End file.
